I have issues…..most of us do. Keb Mo, a masterful blues artist sings, ” I got a suitcase, I take it wherever I go”. Well, packed in my little red sports car of a suitcase is periodical dances with depression. I inherited the ability to visit the darkness from my Dad. He was, for the most part, unable to find his way out. I watched him as well as other people close to me suffer from this and it hurts to see what it does to their light.
We all have are own way of handling our emotional dance partner. My own brand of medicine is daily encounters with exercise and creativity. Regular bouts of both soften the hardness and bring light to my life.
When I run, I tend to let my mind wander around the universe. During one of these runs I had a revelation and it was simply this….I am loved. Now, I’m not talking about a religious deity sort of love, although that’s pretty incredible, too. No, I mean I actually realized just how much love flows towards me. Love from my friends, family, clients, dogs and yes, dare I say, even clay. It was such a bitch slap sort of cognition coupled with an overwhelming sense of gratitude that I actually started crying, sobbing really, right there in the middle of the street with my dog Daisy looking up at me like I was full of crazy.
Now, the admittance of my depression and the realization of being loved may seem disjointed but hear me out. If I can focus and draw upon the fact that I am loved whether by a two legged animal, a person or a seemingly benign product such as clay during these somewhat dark periods then what happens next is indisputable. This simple act of changing the direction of my thoughts instantly makes the heaviness subside. Darkness cannot withstand the light of one candle.
And there’s more! Creatives know that when we let go of trying to control the outcome of our creation, Magic and life have a chance to show up. In a beautifully weird sort of way, being creative on a regular basis brings forth more creativity and more creativity keeps the boogeyman away and then the whole Love thing shows up and before you know it ….You ARE Love.
I just love it when Life shows up and teaches us how to see the light……..
The Life of Mud 
Love the picture and the post Lucia. Our father was “generous” and shared with both us his tendency to live only in the darkness. But he only passed along what he was given himself and he surely did fail to see the bars on his prison cell were only in his mind.
You my dearest sister see the bars for what they are. Projections of our fears as a way to keep us in place. Your art is a testament to the power of beauty to pull us out. Those that see and understand the dark places are the ones that seem most able to create the brightest lights.
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Thank you, my dear brother – for reading my post and replying in such a beautiful way. You should write more often 🙂
Love you!
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